Mind Games Dogs Can Play
On Humans 1. After your humans give you a bath,
DON'T LET THEM TOWEL DRY YOU! Instead, run to their bed, jump up and dry yourself
off on the sheets. This is especially good if it's right before your human's
bedtime. 2. Act like a convicted criminal. When
the humans come home, put your ears back, tail between your legs, chin down
and act as if you have done something really bad. Then, watch as the humans
frantically search the house for the damage they think you have caused. (Note:
This only works when you have done absolutely nothing wrong.) 3.
Let the humans teach you a brand new trick. Learn it perfectly. Then the humans
try to demonstrate it to someone else, stare blankly back at the humans. Pretend
you have no idea what they're talking about. 4.
Make your humans be patient. When you go outside to go 'pee', sniff around
the entire yard as your humans wait. Act as if the spot you choose to go pee
will ultimately decide the fate of the earth. 5. Draw
attention to the human. When out for a walk always pick the busiest, most
visible spot to go 'poo'. Take your time and make sure everyone watches. This
works particularly well if your humans have forgotten to bring a plastic bag. 6.
When out for a walk, alternate between choking and coughing every time a strange
human walks by.
7. Make your own rules. Don't always
bring back the stick when playing fetch with the humans. Make them go and
chase it once in a while. 8. Hide from your humans.
When your humans come home, don't greet them at the door. Instead, hide from
them, and make them think something terrible has happened to you. (Don't reappear
until one of your humans is panic-stricken and close to tears). 9.
When your human calls you to come back in, always take your time. Walk as
slowly as possible back to the door. 10. Wake up twenty
minutes before the alarm clock is set to go off and make the humans take you
out for your morning pee. As soon as you get back inside, fall asleep. |